I have often asked myself this question many times before....but it sits before me today....again! But this time for what would be a good reason if I was to re-live it. Here is the dilemma: Should I start my blogs with everyday banter and then slip in the stories of the past...or should I start with the stories of the past...and meander thru them up until the present day? Because as you see you could learn more about myself and the princes that I live with.......I think I will blog with the intent on the present with small "flashbacks" thrown in for good reading!
So for today I will throw in one of those "flashbacks" as to how I started my life in the middle of Princes!
My 1st prince was born a good 12yrs ago (good lord that sounds so long ago). You know growing up I had always played with Barbies and baby dolls and I had always wanted to be a mom.....but never had I imagined that I would mother a boy! And to be honest since Aj was my 1st baby I didn't really care of what gender he was. But as I said before he was brought into this world by a union that in it's self didn't work out. Although if you had said that to me 10 yrs ago when my world started falling apart and the man I loved at the time didn't want to have a family anymore...I would have said differently. But even when we make bad choices in our life we can either run from them or learn from them.....I decided to learn from them.
So at 23 years of age I became a single mom to a 2 year old little boy.....and he is the only reason that I am still here on this earth today. The whole time growing up you never think that "man I will be divorced and have a baby to raise by myself....wow that sounds neat!!" Yup that is right ladies not once will you ever think that growing up! And they certainly don't teach that lesson in school! But all in all I think I did a pretty good job.....especially since I had a very difficult child on my hands. Hence the reference earlier about "hell on 2 legs"! See as I was raising my child by myself he started to have problems...."meltdowns" if you would call them that over the most stupid things. But what I did not know then and I didn't get told until he was finishing 3rd grade was my son has ADHD and a form of childhood Bipolar....and all those years I thought I was just losing my mind! So you may ask yourself "is he on med's".... my answer is: "no not yet"...I wanted to try other methods 1st. Did they work? Yes in someways they did......he is a lot better than he was almost 4years ago...but as he is getting older it is getting harder again. So we have been throwing that back and forth for a few months now. Aj is a really smart, funny, sweet, wonderful kid....and for the most part he is a good kid. But there are days I think to myself "he may not live to see 13!"
So 10 yrs ago I began this journey by myself and one little prince. I use to wonder most nights would I ever find someone to share my life with? Would someone really want me? Even if I was used and broken?
Well I will tell this story next and my hubby well probably kill me (not really) for blabin' about him....but I didn't really know a lot of things my hubby thought back in the day before he and I and I find it wonderful I know them now! See what I didn't know is that at a young age maybe about 17 or so....my hubby use to watch me from the kitchen window in his Grandmothers house across the street. On one certain day his family teased him about it and he turn to them and said this "I am going to marry her someday!" (fast forward a few years) The day he heard that I had gotten married he"felt his heart brake"! It broke even more when he heard of the new baby. But the day he heard that the "jerk" was gone for good.....he was so happy (I think he even may have done a happy dance...although he will not confirm this out loud). Needless to say he waited for me a very long time! But in 2005 I was married to a wonderful man.....who waited a long time!
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